Alarmists

Let us try and clear the mist- I mean, from the alarmists. They are the ones who keep posting alarmist messages like-

Don't read the newspaper, it'll make your mind weak.
Don't eat pizza, it contains hidden micro-organisms that will cripple you.
Drinking Coke makes you impotent.
Morning walks/jogs can displace your arteries.
Ogling at guys/girls can make you blind.

You get the drift, right? So I decided if I can't beat them, I shall join them. Here I go-

Stay away from Arnab Goswami. He is too serious.
Stay away from Salman's films or you'll lose your shirt!
Stay away from investment bankers. If you don't, you'll lose your pants.
Stay away from parents. They tell you what to do.
Stay away from your teachers. Or you will start believing you are a nitwit.
Don't have kids. They make you cry.
Don't marry. Prevent Chapter 11/bankruptcy.

That's all for now. Back with more if you aren't 100% Satisfied with these.

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